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HAIR

                                March 21, 1991

More dream notes...

I had a dream last night, that centered around my image in
the mirror.  My hair was cut much shorter than it is now...
in fact it looks like I'm developing a bald spot.  This
frightens the hell out of me.  I check my image in various
mirrors. It turns out that it isn't just thinning out, it's
coming out in chunks.  What kind of chemicals have I been
exposed to?  I'm going to look like I've been through
chemotherapy.

I tilt my head          When I realize all        Consciously, I would
forward to look         my hair is falling        have denied that
at the bald spot.       out, I feel relieved.     any of this mattered.
It stretches all        I'd rather be a           I've kidded guys
the way down the        skinhead than just        younger than me
back of my neck.        another guy with          about their bald
It's perfectly          a bald spot.              spots.
smooth, like an                                             Just at a guess,
inverse mohawk.            Fear of                          they didn't think
                           growing                          it was funny.
But you can't see          old.
the back of your                                  But then, there
head this way.           How conventional.        isn't any way that
                                                  I'm ever going to
                                                  go bald.  I've got
                                                  incredibly thick,
                                                  stiff hair.  I could
                                                  lose half of it and
                                                  it would just look
                                                  normal.

(Gotta go. Time for me to go get a hair cut.)

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