"There is someone out there for everyone...
    even if you need a pick ax, shovel and night goggles
    to find them."    -- "LA Story"
             Some years ago (1987?) I decided on criteria
             for an ideal woman, making a conscious attempt
             to avoid the trivial or the unachievable.       LESBIAN_DETECTOR
             The triad I sought: intelligence, depth, athleticism.
             But I was willing to settle for two of the three.
             At least: any woman who obviously exhibited two
             of the qualities was worth chasing.

             The doomfile began with a duality,    DESPERATE 
             "sluts and whores", really: the
             intellectual and the materialistic
             or the liberal and the

             Perhaps this very loosely          (Really, I doubt
             conincides with "depth" and         they correspond
             "intelligence" in my triad.         in any neat way.)

             But what about the athletic?  That
             has it's own set of problems
             associated with it.

             The intellectual is often disgusted
             with the atheletic, and vice

Another approach then:
Think of this as an
information processing problem.

What do you do to locate opportunities?
Ads.  Agencies.
Professional Societies.
Activate your Contacts.

"What color is your parachute?" advises staying away from
the numbers game.  (Plastering women's rooms with resumes?
Mass mailings?  Waiting to be discovered at the bar?)

Unconvential methods of meeting people
have a stigma associated with them,
but they're farily common especially
among people out of school.  Usually
people won't tell you if they met            An undergrad friend of mine,
their spouse some weird way, like            said something about
through the personals ads, dating            relationships that start over
agencies, or even over the net.              the computer.  His comment:
                                             "Sad." My response: "It isn't
A friend of mine reports that                any more pathetic than the
of the two personals ads he                  'normal' things people do,
placed, the one in San                       like hang around in bars."  He
Francisco produced one                       said "But how do you actually
response, and the one in San                 meet somone that way?  Unless
Jose produced five responses.                you use the Chappie method."
Greater paranoia in the bigger               I didn't bother to explain.
cities?  Another guy I know                  Some people are too
placed a personals ad in New                 prejudiced... and you can see
York and also got just one                   why in his case, he knew Perry
response.                                    Friedman.

The paranoia factor is
certainly a problem.  It's not
impossible for me to pick up
women on the street in Palo
Alto, but I have no idea how I
would go about it in New York.
Also, it's easier
to do it during the day than
at night, and so on.

So, there's this guy, he's
been attending a series of
Forum work shops on
interpersonal whatevers and
he's been given a two hour
assignment: he's supposed to
find a woman on the streets of
New York City, give her a
flower and say something like
"Hey, I think you're very
pretty, and I think you should
have this."  Time passes and
he hasn't seen anyone he likes
well enough.  Or maybe he's
just stalling.  He's starting
to worry about getting back to
the Forum meeting on time.  So    My interpretation:
finally he picks out this one     The key thing is he
girl, hands her the flower,       turned away.  If he
says his one line, and says       stood there waiting
"bye, I gotta go."  He turns      he never would've
to leave.  She chases after       got anywhere.  But
him, stops him to talk.  They     how do you apply
exchange phone numbers, and he    this?  How do you
starts going out with her.        chase someone
                                  without chasing
                                  them?  This is the  It turns out that she's
                                  kind of thing that  about sixteen (he likes
                                  literally drives    them skinny).  She's
                                  men to drink.       got to get home early
                                                      every night.  He says
                                                      she gives the most
                                                      painful blowjobs he's
                                                      ever had. (He's never
                                                      heard the adage
                                                      "Get em while their
                                                      young so you can train
                                                      them the way you like
                                                      them.") The
                                                      relationship doesn't
                                                      last long.