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BICYCLES


                                                April 2, 2001

Weirdly enough, I find myself in the position
of bike ambassador to Silicon Valley.  Bike
commuters are rare enough that I'm the first
serious bike commuter that a lot of people
have met.  So there are a bunch of people I
know who seem to be going from the "maybe I
should get a bike someday" mode to the "what
kind of bike should I get?".

The trouble is that they're
asking me this question.

So I'm going to write down
what I know, have heard, and
further theorize about bike
equipment.

A brief history of bikes: 

Once upon a time, every kid was
outfitted with a fairly simple bike:
you were expected to sit upright on
it, it had a single, fixed gear
ratio, and you pedaled it backwards
to stop: these days these are called
"Cruisers".
    
Then there came the 10-speed, and
everyone wanted to own these               On the influence of sports and 
relatively fancy bikes which I gather      sport fashion on technology: 
were more-or-less originally intended      What continually happens is 
for road racing... I'm going to call       that someone produces an 
these "road bikes".                        innovative technology for some 
                                           sort of extreme, artificial, 
Then sometime after that, there came       sport situation, then it 
the invention of the "mountain bike",      becomes stylish to sport your 
which was built a lot more ruggedly,       "sport" equipment in non-sport 
with some lower gears for                  situations, then people come up 
hill-climbing.                             with more moderate versions 
                                           that are cheaper and more 
Mountain bikes became very popular,        practical, but these quickly 
but most of them never saw the side        become un-sexy and people are 
of a mountain, which probably is what      ripe for the next invasion of 
inspired the invention of the              sportiness.   
"hybrid" (a mix between the "road"               
and "mountain" styles), which is the          The tech that spins off from    
kind of bike I've been riding for             sports sometimes strikes me    
over half a decade.                           as a great innovation, but    
                                              quite often it seems majorly    
                                              silly.  E.g. multiple-gears    
                                              are great, but the          
                                              light-weight tin-foil racing    
              Note that what we're            wheels that we were stuck    
              talking about here --           with before the mountain      
              bikes for commuters,            bikes were a pain.          
              for transportion --  
              is strictly speaking 
              completely ignored by 
              the industry.  The 
              "transpo" bike is a tool, 
              not a toy: this is a 
              strange concept to them.

                                                   
Let's consider my hybrid, with which
I have a love-hate relationship.
It's fairly ordinary... it cost about
$350 new, way back when, which makes
it a decent but relatively cheap
bike.  I probably spend that much
again on repairs for it every two
years or so (which is a frustrating
situation: replacing the drive train
is only slightly cheaper than
replacing the whole bike).

I have many, many complaints about
this thing.  It's probably long past
time that I should experiment with a
second bike... more about that later.

The complaints: 

   (1) Straight-across handlebars.

   It's a pretty well known ergonomic fact
   (one of the great discoveries of
   the computer industry), that it's
   a bad idea to hold your hands in
   front of you palms down for a long
   period of time.  Just as with
   flat-keyboards from the pre-ergo
   days, the straight-across bike
   handle bars that the mountain bike
   revolution has subjected us to
   force you to do just that.

   (2) Lean forward posture.

   But long before the "mountain"
   bike, we were subjected to a fad
   from the road-racing world for
   leaning forward on your hands to
   reduce your wind resistance.
                             
   So we all go about supporting our
   weight on our hands as we go
   bumping along the road, typically
   without any shock absorption
   except for our wrists.

   (3) No chain guard. 

   My bike came without any chain guard
   whatsoever, not even one of those
   diminutive little rings next to the
   big chain ring.  Looking around, it
   seems to me like about half the
   hybrids out there are sold like this.
      
   Wanna make some easy cash?  Find a    
   sleazy trial lawyer to partner                
   with, and arrange an accident where        Name another piece of 
   your pants cuffs get stuck in the          consumer equipment         
   gearing.  With any luck you'll get         with completely               
   an old-fart of a judge that                exposed gearing             
   remembers riding a cruiser around          next to the user's    
   when he was a kid.                         clothes.             
                                              
      
   (4) The claim that cycling can cause              
   impotence is old news at this point,              
   though I don't know of any definitive
   evidence one way or the other. The   
   new bike seat designs that have come                     
   out really are more comfortable, it                   Been using a       
   makes sense to switch to one.                         Terry Liberator 
                                                         for years now      
                                                         (2004): not bad. 
   It seems pretty clear to me                                               
   that the standard design of                                           
   bike seats is pretty stupid.   (in fact, in my        This is an early   
                                  opinion, the           "ergo" seat design, 
   It's not unusual for me to     standard design        so the gap in      
   arrive somewhere feeling       of bicycles            the middle is big and 
   like someone tried to kick     overall is             obvious (which is 
   me in the balls and only       pretty stupid).        okay) and it rides 
   just missed...                                        a little hard, which 
                                                         is less okay.  
   I ride a fairly typical hybrid,                       
   without any fancy rock                                Later products have 
   shocks, and lately I have                             more shock absorption.
   taken to wearing padded        
   shorts a lot, though that's              
   always seemed like a really    
   backwards solution to me.      
                                   (Everyone's seen the Dilbert
   I've met a number               take on the subject,        
   of women who seem               right? "Great Solutions in  
   to think that bike              Engineering History")       
   seats were                                           
   designed to                                          Sport riders 
   accommodate men                                      love having   
   only... in fact                                      to change    
   they don't seem to                                   into special 
   be designed for                                      gear. Transpo
   human beings.                                        riders hate it. 
                                  

   (5) In general, many necessities are optional.        
      
   In addition to the problems of chain                   
   guards and ergo seats, it's fairly                  
   difficult to use a bike as transport
   without the following "options":    
                                                      
      Some sort of attachments to carry    
      stuff: it used to be common to have                          
      baskets on the front (sometimes the        As is not uncommon,    
      rear sides), now tiny flat beds on         the current standard          
      the back of the bike are favored.          is nearly useless    
      But even that doesn't come standard        for any practical   
      with the bike.                             purpose:            
                                                                         
      Fenders, especially a                        That tiny rear            
      rear fender to keep                          flatbed is                
      your back wheel from                         pointless        E.g. the 
      shooting muddy water                         compared to a    bag of   
      up your butt when it's                       front basket.    groceries
      raining.  (Sometimes that                                     problem. 
      flat bed isn't big enough.)                    So of course,            
                                                     the basket is
      Head-light and flashing                        regarded as 
      tail-light.                                    old-fashioned 
                                                     tech.        
      Helmet                                                   No cool person
                                                               will be caught
      Water bottle                                             dead with it. 
      and cage to        All water bottles sold for      
      carry it.          this purpose are useless          
                         unless you enjoy the                                
      Rear-view          flavor of plasticizers.     Re-use a one-liter      
      mirror                                         soda bottle instead    
                                                     (e.g. seven-up or    
      Simple repair                                  club soda... cola  
      tools -- tire                                  flavor makes the 
      pump, patch                                    water taste almost 
      kit, maybe a        First aid kits             as bad as the         
      spare tube,         aren't a bad               cola does).        
      etc, (the bike      idea, either.              
      analog of the                                             
      car-jack).                            
                       
      "Toughies" (kevlar tire                                    
      inserts) or possibly          After all, why would you want the
      puncture resistant inner      tires themselves to be able to             
      tubes if you can find         resist a puncture?  What a          
      them.                         frivolous weight addition that      
                                    would be. 
      And of course: locks. 
                                        Interesting thing about 
         That's plural.                 toughies: because 
         You need to lock               they're not integral to 
         the front and back             the tire, there's 
         wheels and frame,              always a ridge where 
         and maybe the                  the two ends meet, and 
         seat...                        sometimes *that* wears 
                                        through the inner-tube. 
 
 
               BIKE_SAFELY 
 
 
    It might be unrealistic to think that all 
    of the above items could be or should be 
    made standard, but I think a strong case 
    can be made that consumers are getting  
    screwed by an artificially lowered
    up-front price.
                                              
    Anything that you buy as an optional      
    attachment is going to lack the           
    economies of scale that make a            
    mass-produced bike fairly cheap.          
                                              
    Everyone knows that building a custom bike
    from raw parts is horrendously expensive  
    compared to buying a new bike.            
                                              
    If you're buying a transpo biking system, 
    you're stuck doing exactly that kind of   
    custom assembly, where the "bike" is just 
    one component.                            
                                              


(6) (update, 2004) Funny, I forgot to add
this one: Bike brakes are terrible.      
Consider the difference in mass between a
bike and a car, and consider the fact    
that they have roughly the same stopping 
distance.  Is this because bike brakes   
have to be light-weight devices?  Nope:  
it's because bike riders have their                Note: there's a trick 
centers-of-gravity jacked up and pushed            to stopping short on 
forward, over the front wheel.  If the             a diamond frame bike:  
brakes were any good, people would fly             get your butt off of the 
over the front handle bars when they hit           the seat, and crouch down 
them.                                              behind it, with your sternum
                                                   almost touching the seat.
Recumbent bikes make a lot more                    
sense in this respect.                             Then you can get away 
                                                   with really slamming the 
                                                   brakes, even if you're 
                                                   going down hill.

There are some other points I can add...
in general there's a problem with the
expectation that most people are cycling
for sport rather than transportation.
   
The bikes themselves                                   
are often not very        Over the years, whenever          
durable (they don't       my hybrid needed repairs,          
have to be: most          I'd replace the parts                
people buy them and       with the beefiest ones I     Heavy walled wheels,    
throw them in the         could find...                heavy tires, heavy    
garage).                                               gears... then I     
                                                       started breaking the    
                                                       frames.  I did this    
And bike clothing tends to                             *twice*: once it was    
be made out of plasticy                                under warranty and    
fabrics that start reeking                             they replaced the    
after you use them even                                frame.  A year later    
once... a week's worth of                              I broke that one.    
wear and they're positively                                                 
foul.                                                     (Actually, if you    
                                                          care I think both    
   If there's something                                   times I broke the    
   that you absolutely                                    "dropouts", the   
   have to have when you                                  hooks that are   
   ride -- bike shorts;                                   welded into the   
   a polar fleece                                         frame, which hold 
   jacket, gloves -- you                                  the rear wheel.)     
   better have more than                                                       
   one set (in fact five 
   or more wouldn't be 
   out of line).            
                              
                                     
Another thing I could gripe about:                      
the old toe-clip problem. First of       
all, the basic peddles that come on             
most bikes are clearly sub-optimal:      
You can push down with the front          
foot, but not pull upward with the      
rear one; and even worse, your feet
tend to slide off the peddles if   
you push forward.                  
                                         
So what do you do?  The traditional
solution is toe-clips: these are       
insanely dangerous for urban
cycling.  They take a lot of
practice to learn to insert your
feet into when you're getting
started (and you need to do this at
every light) and if you have to do
an emergency stop, Good Fucking
Luck.  If you're slow about getting
a foot out and on the ground, it's
really easy to flop over and maybe
mess up your wrist when you land.
                 
Ah, but modern bike technology has a
solution!  *Special shoes* and special
peddles that clip to the bottom of the
shoes.  I haven't tried these, but:
                 
(a) in general, the idea that you need          
to completely change your outfit when        Even helmets are a little
you want to ride your bike is a loser        dubious.  You're probably
for transportation cycling.  It's bad        better off with a helmet 
enough you've got to waste time on the       than without, but if the 
lock-up procedure.                           need to buy a helmet and 
                                             lug it around with you 
(b) They look really dorky.  And yes,        discourages you from     
I've seen the ones that are supposed         riding, you'd be better  
to pass for ordinary street shoes:           off just riding and going
they look like *really dorky* ordinary       without.                 
street shoes.                                                       
                                                    The word is that    
   For this one, there *is*                         helmet laws for     
   a pretty good solution                           kids are a bad idea:    
   out there though:                                The health benefits    
   there's a product called                         of the exercise        
   "mini-clips", that are                           vastly outweigh     
   like slightly beefier                            any risk of head    
   plastic toe-clips                                injury.             
   without the straps.                              
   They don't grab your                                   You pass a    
   feet anywhere near as                                  helmet law,   
   tightly as the regular                                 the kids don't 
   toe-clips, so they take                                get helmets,  
   much less practice to                                  they just     
   learn to get a foot into                               stop riding.      
   them.  And they're a                                                        
   hell of easier to get                                                     
   your foot out of.           This is one more item         
                               for the "too bad it's                         
                               not standard" list.                       
   
                               

                     
One more gripe, though: My bike
originally came with plastic peddles.
They worked okay, but after years of
heavy riding, they wore out.  I go into a
spiff bike shop, and after being subjected
to their spiel in favor of the dorky shoe
system, they finally agree to put a set
of regular peddles on the bike.  "You're
going to really like these" they tell me.
"These are really good."
   
It turns out they outfitted me    
with these insanely sadistic    
spiky sharp metal peddles,                               
reminiscent of racing cleats                          
on shoes, except that these                 
are pointed at your body.                
                                         Actually, that's        
Don't screw up getting on the            still another complaint    
bike, or they'll scrape your             I've got, though I      
shin off.  Careful walking the           don't know that there's    
bike, it's *distantly possible*          a reasonable solution:  
you might slam your shin into            Often, you *need*       
one of those peddles, eh?                to get off your bike      
                                         and walk it.  Oops,     
                                         forgot your shin guards,
                                         didn't you?             
                                                                     
                                         
                                                    
Another complaint, in two parts: 
 
(a) Every beginning cyclist, when 
they want to park their bike for          Caveat: there's a simple 
just a minute, tries leaning their        trick for temporary bike 
handle bars against something.            parking: you prop the seat    
This works for a minute at most           against something, *not*    
before the bike suddenly decides          the handle bars.  Prop the    
to fall over.                             *back* of the bike against     
                                          something, let the front do    
                                          whatever it wants.         
(b) When you need to walk up a stair-                                
case with your bike, you pick it up       
by the cross-bar and throw it on your     
shoulder.  The smart cyclist keeps it     
pointed nose-down so that the front       
wheel stays pointed straight ahead.       
If by some strange chance the outside     
handlebar should brush something, the     This is one of the better 
wheel swings to the right, then           arguments in favor of wearing 
pendulums back to the left, and           a helmet.  If you remember to 
the inside handle bar smashes you in      keep your head down, the    
the face.                                 handle-bars hit the helmet, 
                                          not your face.
  Both of these points result    
  from the same oddity of      
  standard bike design: When      
  the bike isn't in motion,    
  twist your handlebars, see                  
  how far you can turn them.                     
  On most bikes you can flip        
  them around almost 180            
  degrees before the wheel hits    
  the bike frame.              
                                       
  Think about that for a moment.             
  Is there any reason at all for 
  that wheel to be able to do that?
       
    The obvious fix -- for       
    point (b), at least --               
    is to add some stops to           Even 90 degrees seems excessive,    
    keep the wheel from               but every so often that's helpful    
    turning more than, say,           when you need to spin the bike    
    90 degrees.                       around in a tight space (e.g.    
                                      on Caltrains).                    
    It wouldn't be that hard          
    to have some kind of                            
    spring that tends to                            
    return the wheel back to     Also, this would                       
    the center position.         probably make the                      
                                 bike more stable                       
                                 when trying to ride                    
                                 with out hands.                        
                                                                        
                                           (Yeah, I know, that's not    
                                           recommended.  If I haven't   
                                           planned ahead and put tissues
                                           in my shirt pocket, letting  
                                           go of the handle bars for a  
                                           moment is almost inevitable  
                                           while I dig them out.)       
                                               

And still another complaint 
(I've given up counting):

Consider the freewheel.  These days, it
seems like there's a competition to
squeeze lots of gears on to it, so you
can advertise an umpty-seventeen speed
bike.  The trouble is that a lot of
these gears are so close together in
size that there's not much of a change
in gear-ratios when you change gears.

But gear-ratios are the name of the
game, specifically a *wide-range* of
ratios, rather than necessarily a large
number of them.  I want a really small
back gear for fast road riding, and a
really humongous granny gear for hill
climbing, and a few in between for
accelerating from a stop.

My theory is that this notion
(coarse-grained gear-ratios) is a
hard order to fill with the current
style of derailleur and freewheel.
The freewheel has to approximate a
cone, so that the derailleur can
slide the chain sideways across it.

I suggest that this means it's time for a new 
technology in bike transmissions...




getting bent (someday):

Given the fact that I've been whining about
the inadequacies of diamond frame bikes for
years, maybe it's about time I try something
different, huh?

((I was toying with buying a "Bike E" recumbent,
but for various reasons, as of March 24, 2004 I
still haven't gotten to it.  These days I'm
riding a basic mountain bike with some shocks on
the front forks.))                   

        Review of the Mountain Bike:          
        seems really sluggish compared    November 10, 2004
        to my old hybrid.  Probably I 
        need to lose the knobby tires, 
        but I don't think that's the 
        whole problem. 
                       
           The shocks are nice in some 
           respects: riding down a dark, 
           unfamiliar street, I can slam 
           right into a pot hole without 
           it being a disaster. 
              
              In other respects though: 
              they make the front end of                  Nov 26, 2005:
              the bike softer, so it                      It turns out that 
              kneels down a little when                   these front shocks
              you slam on the breaks,                     are even worse than 
              and the old fear of going                   I thought.
              over the handlebars raises                  
              it's head again.                            Even with them 
                                                          cranked down as 
                  This mountain bike seems to             stiff as I can 
                  have a little trouble stopping          get them, I have 
                  short, compared to my old               problems with 
                  hybrid.  Wonder why, eh?                them suddenly 
                                                          "clicking through".
                                                                             
                                                          The front-end      
                                                          likes to kneel 
                                                          down suddenly
                                                          and throw me off 
                                                          the bike: I've 
                                                          wiped out twice 
                                                          like this now.
                                                          
                                                          This sudden 
                                                          "click through"
                                                          behavior isn't 
                                                          *completely*
                                                          unpredictable 
                                                          though, it seems 
                                                          to have something 
                                                          to do with 
                                                          braking and 
                                                          turning at the 
                                                          same time.
                                                          
                                                          Now that I'm  
                                                          conscious of it,
                                                          I seem to be 
                                                          able to avoid 
                                                          it... 
                                                          
                                                          We're still at 
                                 My current guess:        a stage where 
                                 seat post shocks         it requires too 
                                 are good; front          much skill to 
                                 fork shocks are          ride a bike 
                                 stupid.                  safely.
                                        




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