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TETSUO

                                    July 21, 1992 
                      
                      (A movie review posted to usenet). 

Tetsuo: The Iron Man  
                                                      
A Japanese, arty flick, supposedly using horror movie tropes
to make some sort of cyberpunk comment on modern culture.
It's got some moments, but it's mostly just dull and stupid. 

To understand the plot of this movie, it helps a lot to read
one of the newspaper reviews that are floating around.
There's nothing particularly deep about it, but the movie
isn't very good at communicating what's supposed to be
happening: a "metal fetishist" inserts a piece of rusty
metal tubing into his leg, freaks out and runs in front of a
car which is being driven by a "salary man" and his girl
friend.  The salary man then seems to be infected with some
sort of disease that progressively transforms him into
metal.  The thankfully black and white look of this movie,
involves various disgusting looking chaotic masses of old
machine parts protruding from human bodies (like
"Videodrome", but not done as well).  

In the only scene that's worth anything in the movie,
the "salary man" undergoes the bulk of his
transformation into metal while making love with his
girlfriend.  At first it seems like they might do
something interesting with it (she says something like
"No, show it to me.  I don't frighten easily."), but
it degenerates into the usual horror movie hysterics
(a suggestion for directors: prevent the actors from
screaming, using gags if necessary).  Anyway, he
emerges from hiding covered in metal, his penis
transformed into a huge power drill.  They spend some
time running around, fighting.  While she has him
briefly subdued, there's a hint that she's turned on
by his new body, but he kills her with his new tool.
It isn't clear if she meant for this to happen, but if
you believe the reviews she "dies in ecstasy".

I might excuse the excesses and clumsiness of this
movie if I thought they really had something
worthwhile to say, but they just don't.  This whole
business about the transformation "just happening"
like some sort of disease is dumb any way you look at
it.  Cyberpunk is about turning yourself into a
monster on purpose, not by accident.  And this 
general theme of technology being out of control, an
implacable, inhuman force... it isn't just wrong, it's
old and stale too.

(The music is pretty good though.  If you're into moody
industrial music, you might want to check out the
sound track.  For that matter, this movie would probably be
okay as a dance club light show). 





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