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PRONOUN_ETIQUETTE
February 17, 2026
I'm an old-fashioned kind of guy
who likes transvestites and drag queens.
TRANS
The way drag identities work is you're
given visual queues to tell you when the
identity is in play, to let you know the
intended gender. And as a courtesy,
you're supposed to try to use pronouns
appropriate for that gender.
The current style (in use in the
blue zones, anyway): since any This is an approach taken by
fixed rules may seem restrictive software developers on occasion.
to someone, anyone can define any
pronouns they wish to be addressed "We can't make up our minds what to
by, and you're mostly just call this-- so let's let the
supposed to remember this. users define it any way they want."
These pronouns must be used And in the absence of standard
irrespective of: naming, no one ever knows what
anything is.
o appearance
o traditional associations When something is adjustable,
of first names it must always be adjusted.
o the sex at birth
(needless to say) Every freedom brings
a limitation.
A woman wearing heavy femme
makeup may insist on "he".
A straight-looking guy
with a normie appearence
may insist on "they".
But I think there are implicit
rules about which pronouns
you're allowed to choose.
My idea of just calling me
"that asshole" has not been
respected.
I think it's interesting
that the older style is in
some ways more fluid--
you can change your drag
identity every day.
The modern style is more in
the direction of adjusting
your persona to fit your True
Self, and since you're only In this sentence,
expected to have one, there's might "others" and
often an implicit assumption But since some are "many" be thought
you're not going to make these hyper-sensitive of as pronouns?
adjustments frequently. about others
getting their
(But then, I'm told in special pronouns
the world of left-wing wrong, the easy
non-profits, some people solution is just
may announce different to avoid using
pronouns in every zoom them.
session.)
Pronouns may stop being
pronouns, and become part
of your name, like a formal
title. Mr/Mrs/Miss/Ms has
gone out of fashion, now we
have a new set of them.
Okay, so this all annoys me (I
have enough trouble remembering
even just first names), but I get
annoyed about lots of things and
there's no particular reason you
should care about that.
But I do think it annoys many of
us, it just doesn't get a lot of No one seems to know where this new
pushback because we don't want to etiquitte came from-- someone must've
sound like conservative jerks. invented it, someone must've decided this
is the right way. So who? We certainly
If you want to convince everyone weren't ever asked to vote on it.
of your loyalty, you've got to
talk the talk and not complain. It does however have legal implications,
if you repeatedly get a pronoun wrong
that can be interpreted as harassment.
The pronoun business can bother someone
like me and I'm really and truly on the You know, respect for
"progressive" side on this stuff-- diversity, freedom of sexual
identity, queer rights, trans
This one looks like an unforced error rights, etc. All sounds good.
to me, a well-intentioned doctrine
that can be made to look crazy and Maybe I need more
used to discredit-- it forces normies pages like this: ASTERIX
to jump through hoops to accommodate
small slices of the population. I'm just someone who
cares more about
But I understand why you substance than
might be leery of this symbolic actions--
line of argument these
days-- Or the stuff I regard as
substantive-- where symbolism
"But if you do *that* you is concerned its always hard
will alienate the middle to distinguish whether its so
and lose elections!" effective it deserves to be
regarded as substantive.
That's a popular line with
the moderate extremists SYMBOLIC_ACTION
(who keep losing elections
anyway). MULTI_FEMINISMS
MODERATE_JIHAD
But that doesn't change the
fact that it can be true.
You really can "go too far"
and inadvertantly convince
many that your side is too
crazy to take seriously.
But okay, here we have a new way of
doing things that's the supposely And anyway: I may
the accepted way, and I'm just going think it's silly,
to have to accept it. but at least it's
well-intentioned.
I'm just one of those old guys
who need to get with it, eh?
But I sincerely doubt that this is going
to be the way things are forever, and
you young folks should not be surprised
if the next round of young folks seems
unimpressed--
"All right millennial, why don't
you tell us again how you're
going to save the world with
vanity pronouns?"
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